Saturday, July 2, 2016

LEAD IN DE PENCIL!

We Bajans too love lil confusion, nuff gossip and we love to hear bout scandal, especially of de man woman kind, dese days man pun man and woman pun woman rivaling fuh we headlines and anything dat involve government, big up people and tiefing does score big pun de gossip network!
Plenty of dese elements did in play dese past few weeks and a number of people, young and middle aged drop dead sudden so and by de start of las week de gossip mill had de talk shows and social media pun fire.
So de story goes dat de unusual number of people leaving dis planet suddenly was related to de new water meters, supposedly due to lead content and apparently dat de said same meters get reject in Canada because dem did not meet de standards of de Canadians.
Conclusion? Lead killing Bajans!
Now fuh years I grow up knowing dat de ole time houses had water pipes mek outa lead, in fact when I buy de lil ole house I got, I had to re-plumb de property and my plumber Mr Ken Bynoe, a boss plumber say market, yuh gine have to tek out dese lead pipes and put in more modern pipes, yuh gine have to lay new pipe!I always found laying new pipe fascinating cause yuh know when yuh put it in, I gine be in fuh a long time!
Growing up I use to think I should be a plumber cause everytime I even look at a young lady or worse yet bring home one I use to get lecture by me mother, she use to warn me bout laying pipe and warn de young ladies too bout lead and pipes! I swear mum did want me to be a plumber! “stay far from dat pipe young lady, if yuh know what is good for yuh!” a not uncommon refrain!
And de food and vitamins mum would serve from shark oil, seamoss, dasheen and farine I was always lead to believe would put lead in de pencil! And as a school boy in knew well dat I needed a long pencil, properly sharpened to do my work wid!
So when I hear dat people deading from lead, de Vendor had to sit up, how come de lead bad fuh we, is it dat we get soft and can no longer handle de lead, why would dis cause people to die, ah mean I have heard people holler out “oh lord ah gine dead” only to realize dat them still well and in good health minutes later!
JoyAnn Haigh had to brek she holiday to come pun de radio and declare dat it was a lie dat lead killng people, a bigger lie dat de water meters get reject from Canada and unsafe fuh Bajans, imagine when poor Miss Haigh should have been enjoying some lead free days she get interrupt to put out a disclaimer” My pipe nor my meter ain’t got no lead!”
And then pun de weekend, de acting chief medical officer Dr.Kenneth George put out a statement showing dat de people did NOT die from lead but from a variety of medical conditions not related to de Barbados Water Authority meters and lead! Imagine dat!
De facts are dat de deaths occurred from heart attacks, strokes, blood clots, brain haemorrhaging and other non-communicable diseases! Yuh think dat gine stop de Bajan rumour mill, yuh got to be joking, just now my phone gine ring and I sure somebody gine start “ Market you hear bout so and so?” we love lil gossip, it does bring some excitement otherwise boring lives, and de more important de person, de sweeter de bad news, currently Mark Maloney is flavor of de month in dat department!
I think it is time fuh me to get back to trying to be a good plumber, practice makes perfect, I got some pipe to lay, my yard irrigation need upgrading!

I Market Vendor gone fuh now, you have a blessed and a wonderful day, yuh hear?

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